01The Complete Idiot
You know this guy, or woman. They have somehow managed to make it through life without dying, or getting into some horrendous accident. Which is surprising considering they don't know how to do the simplest tasks on their own. Are consumers supposed to look at these bozos and think, "yeah...I empathize, it is tough to open drink from a cup sometimes."
02The Nagging Wife
"Change the lightbulb. Put the garbage out. Bring the garbage in. You're not going out in that shirt. No, the guys can't come over and play poker. Why aren't you nicer to my mother? What kind of time do you call this?!" You have to wonder, when exactly did the love of his life become the bane of his existence? And does this woman really exist in reality?
03The Utter Slob
If there was an olympic event for being a big, fat, uncultured slob, it would be this guy. He has made a permanent indentation in the sofa. He drinks and eats more than a cow grazing in a field. He has skin that looks like the surface of the moon. And he smells worse than a dead skunk in a pile of manure. His only use in advertising is to make you feel good about yourself.
"Duuuuude, we're so gonna get drunk and hook up with tons of hot chicks!" Why is almost every beer commercial filled with guys like this? They live to crack awful jokes, down beers in one go, and shout stuff at women that would make Gilbert Gottfried blush. No style, no panache, no chance of ever getting the women he drools at all night.
05The Easily Confused
"Wait, you're saying that I can get these three packs for the price of two, and save money on my weekly shop? Are you serious? How is that even possible? What's the catch, there has to be a catch, right?" This woman, or man, never seems to grasp the amazing offers they're being shown. They also have a really had time handling tough tasks...like opening cans, or washing windows.
06The Everyday Supermodel
It happens. Of course it does. But in advertising, it happens way too often. These incredible looking women, wearing amazing clothes (or barely any), but doing the most mundane chores, are everywhere. They wake up looking perfect. They do grocery shopping like they're walking down a runway. And they do a lot of sports for tampon commercials, too.
07The Cheery Spokesperson
Wow, they really love their jobs. Or do they? You can feel the fake sincerity oozing out of their every pore. They love to wax lyrical about the insurance options on offer, the number of loads of laundry you can do, or how satisfying that burger was. Do we believe them? No. Do we wish they would all go away? Only the actors playing them would say no.
08The Awful Boss
If there are any bosses out there as bad as the ones we see in adverts, we must do everything we can to get rid of them. No one can really be this bad, can they? Slimy, nasty, ego-driven maniacs, who work their employees to death despite the presence of a very litigious-minded HR department in every modern company.
09The Overworked Mom
Running from errand to errand, a kid in one hand, 10 bags of groceries in the other, while simultaneously kicking a football to help little Timmy with his soccer practice. This woman doesn't just multi-task...she juggles more than five professionals from Cirque Du Soleil at once. And boy, is she tired. If only there were some relief coming, in the form of a cup of coffee, or a relaxing bath. Oh wait...there it is.
10The Clumsy Oaf
This guy, or woman, sucks at life. They trip. They spill everything. They crash. They make awful goofs at parties. They make Mr. Bean look like James Bond, and they are there for one reason...to show you that even someone as dumb and clumsy as they are can use a certain product. In fact, it turns them from bumbling fool, to slick willy.